That old demon has been surfacing recently and I'm really struggling. I've even picked up the OA book "Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions" and have been reading it. I do feel that my relationship with food at times could be classified as an addiction. It's hard when you're a food addict, because unlike other addiction you still do have to figure out a way to have it in your life. The way you have abstinence when you're a food addict is by not using food in a maladaptive way. Easier said than done. But, I'm taking one day at a time and I'm truly trying. I wish that obtaining a certain number on the scale wasn't an important measure of health and success. I mean if you don't have that number you're deemed unhealthy...or at least less healthy. It's frustrating when I know how hard I've worked. I'm not perfect by any stretch...but I have worked very, very hard.
My weigh in this week was a bust. I gained. Maybe it's water since my friend is visiting me right now...or maybe it's all the snacking I did in the last week. Either way, the scale did not give me the number I was hoping for.
Ah well...tomorrow's another day, right.